Prologue: The Book of Flacko, Prophet of Drip
In the beginning was Rakim Athelaston Mayers, born in the land of Harlem, who took up the sacred name of A$AP Rocky and preached unto the people through rhythm and rhyme. His verses climbed the charts as psalms of modern swagger — from “Peso” to “L$D,” his music flowed with silk and street, melody and mischief. Yet lo, the multitudes soon saw that his gospel was not of sound alone. For Rocky walked among mortals robed in visions — runway robes, Parisian pearls, scarves of heavenly hue. He spake in interviews of art, of Raf Simons and Rick Owens, of colour and confidence; and the fashion faithful listened, for here was a man both lyrical and sartorial, the rare union of beat and beauty.
And it came to pass that he, the self-anointed Lord of Cool, lifted the humble accessory from earthly trinket to divine relic. Where others saw chains, he saw commandments; where they saw handbags, he saw haloes. Thus he rewrote the law of men’s adornment — and yea, it was good. What followeth, brethren of taste, are the Ten Commandments of A$AP Rocky’s Accessory Gospel, that ye too may walk the path of blessed style and find eternal freshness.
I. Thou Shalt Wear Thy Necktie Neat
Whether thou art robed in the finery of the courts or strolling the boulevards in casual grace, let thy necktie hang true and noble. For the tie, though humble, is the ribbon that binds elegance to swagger. To knot it carelessly is heresy; to knot it well is salvation. Remember, brethren of style: the necktie sanctifieth the collar, and the collar proclaimeth the man.
II. Please Thy Lord of Cool with Handbags and Shoulder Satchels
Covet not thine neighbour’s tote, but carry thine own with faith and flair. Be not miserly in the matter of bags, for blessed is he who wandereth the streets of Paris or Harlem with leather upon his shoulder. A$AP himself hath decreed that the handbag is no sin, but a sign of enlightened masculinity. Swing it proudly, as one who knoweth the gospel of good taste.
III. Honour Thy Fingers and Ears (with rings and blings), for They Were Made to Shine
Thy fingers are holy instruments — they text, they touch, they create beats divine. Therefore, adorn them as they deserve. Let not their beauty go forth naked into the world. Rings of silver, of gold, of sparkling stone — these are the psalms of self-expression. And lo, pierce thine ears too, if thou art bold, that they may glimmer like the gates of heaven on a summer day.
IV. Let thy scarf both shield and shine; let winter marvel at thy drip divine
For verily, winter is no excuse for dressing meek. A$AP Rocky hath shown that the scarf is not mere armor against frost, but a holy emblem of swagger. Wrap it high, let its colors smite the gray, its textures tempt the saints. Be it cashmere, plaid, or designer weave worthy of heavenly envy, remember: warmth is but one blessing. The other is spectacle divine. For when styled with faith and flair, the scarf transformeth man into marvel, and cold streets into his glittering runway.
V. Men Shalt Not Look Down Upon the Humble Babushka
Scoff not, O ye of little style, at the sacred headscarf of grandmothers. For the Babushka, once the garb of the meek, hath been exalted by the Prophet Rocky into a crown of cool. Pay homage unto it — yea, join thy palms and bow thy head — for wrapped around thine brow it bringeth both mystery and mercy. Blessed are the men who dare, for theirs is the kingdom of couture.
VI. Forsake Not Thy Neck, Lest It Go Unadorned
Let not thy neck wander barren as the desert, but clothe it in gold, in chain, in choker. For such is the proper worship of the temple that is thy throat. A$AP hath shown that a single pendant may move mountains and melt hearts. Be not faint of fashion — layer thy chains like verses of devotion, and raise thy chin as one who knoweth his worth.
VII. Adorn Thy Bosom and Braids with Pearls of Great Price
Once pearls were the playthings of duchesses — now they are the jewels of the street. Thus speaketh Rocky: “Go forth, and make the lustrous righteous.” String them ‘round thy neck, thy wrist, or thy braids if thou art truly debonair. Let their glow reflect thy confidence, and their calm mirror thy composure. Pearls are no longer delicate; they are divine.
VIII. Upon Thy Head Wear the Blessed Beanie — that Crown of a Contented Connoisseur.
Verily, let not thy head go bare when chill winds conspire, for the beanie is both shield and style. A$AP Rocky hath shown that to adorn thy crown with knitted grace is to master both warmth and wonder. Whether perched high like a halo or pulled low in monkish calm, it proclaimeth: thou art cozy, yet cool beyond mortal measure. Praise be to snugness, for in the gospel of style, the beanie redeemeth all bad hair days.
IX. Shield Thine Eyes from the Sinful Glare of the Sun
Protect thy gaze, for it is sacred. Let not the wicked rays of daylight scorch thy vision nor dull thy mystery. Sunglasses are armour for the soul, whether tinted rose, obsidian, or of mismatched lenses — for the faithful fear not asymmetry. Wear them indoors if thou must, for even prophets need privacy. Style is thine confession booth.
X. Adorn Thy Teeth, for They Are Divine Relics
Teeth are the jewels of the mouth, and Rocky hath blessed them with gold. Grills are not vanity but veneration — a radiant hymn sung in 18-karat glory. Thus, adorn thy smile as thou wouldst an altar, and flash it proudly unto the congregation of the streets. For the Lord of Style delighteth in those who gleam when they grin.
Epilogue: Benediction of the Drip Eternal
And when the final chain hath been clasped and the last pearl laid upon the neck, remember these words of the Prophet Rocky: “Fashion is confidence made visible.” Verily, he who keepeth these commandments shall not stumble in style nor stray into sloppiness. Let not the timid mock thy babushka, nor the unbeliever scorn thy handbags, for the Lord of Cool favoureth the bold.
Wear thy grills with grace, thy socks with sanctity, and thy sunglasses as shields of glory. Bless thy mirror each morning and confess thy sins to the dry-cleaner. And should doubt ever cloud thy drip, whisper softly: “What would Flacko wear?”
And may the blessings of A$AP — patron saint of pearls and prophet of panache — shine upon thee, now and forever in fashion. Amen.